Give Me Grace
by itstisdalebro
Summary: A story in Sharpay's POV of the tragic death of her 3-year-old daughter and how she gets through life afterwards. CHAPTER 8 POSTED
1. Chapter 1

**This story is in honor of a little girl named Ava Rosemeyer. She tragically passed away after accidentally locking herself in her parents car in the hot sun. She would have been 10 years old yesterday (August 22). This is for you, Ava.**

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**Chapter 1**

The day we lost Gracie was the worst day of our lives. I just remember feeling like it wasn't real. It wasn't happening. We were all just so caught up with what we were doing, we didn't realize how long she'd been gone. Her plan was to go to Grandpa's house. That's Troy's dad. He lived right next door. The kids came and went between houses as they pleased. Supposedly, she'd forgotten something over there so I let her go by herself to get it. She wasn't one to go somewhere she wasn't allowed, so I didn't even bother worrying about it. Roughly forty-five minutes later, I went to look for her. I asked Jack if Gracie was still at his house and he said she'd come home about thirty minutes ago.

That sent me into panic mode. When she came home, she always announced her arrival. We checked everywhere. Jack's place, both backyards, both basements, both everything in both houses. She had a battery powered Barbie car in our garage, so we even checked there to see if she'd gotten it out. When we saw that it was still in place, we really panicked. Fortunately, our oldest son Bryce noticed that our van's driver window was slightly cracked. He knew that we never left the windows down.

I ran to that van as quick as possible, and inside the driver seat was our precious Gracie. She seemed asleep. She had a bag of Swedish Fish in her lap and she was slumped down in the seat, her hair completely soaked from sweating. I had the van's keys in my pocket, but I couldn't think to use them to unlock the door. Instead, I took off one of my heels and bashed it against the window.

I know you're supposed to break the window furthest away from the child, but I was in panic mode. I didn't bother unlocking the door. I just lifted little Gracie out of the van and immediately ran inside, Troy hot on my trail, Bryce hot on his, and Jack hot on his. I didn't know what I was going to do. I was scared to death that my baby girl was already dead. I couldn't think. All I knew was that I wanted her to wake up.

Troy was the calm one. He helped me through everything. He was strong while I was weak. I still feel bad for not being stronger. I had him to be strong while I was weak, but he didn't have me to be strong while he was weak. I feel horrible for not being strong enough to be there for him. He's always been the strong one.

I was sixteen years old when I got pregnant with Bryce. Eighteen with Matt. We were young parents, and I was scared shitless. Especially with Bryce.

"_What are we gonna do, Troy? I'm a kid, I can't raise one," I sobbed._

"_We're going to be fine, okay? We can do this, I promise," Troy said, cupping my face. "We'll get through this."_

"_How? We're kids. We're in high school, we don't have jobs..."_

"_We can work at Lava Springs."_

"_I am not going to be the help at my own country club."_

_Troy sat next to me, kissing my head. "We'll figure something out. I promise. We just have to keep our heads up and give this baby the best life he or she can have. We'll make sure we're the best teenaged parents there are. We'll give this baby inspiration."_

_I sniffled and stared at Troy, looking back and forth into those gorgeous blue eyes of his. I laid my head down on his shoulder. "Will we be good parents?"_

"_We'll be amazing parents. We'll never let anything bad happen to this baby. Ever."_

We didn't let anything bad happen to Bryce. But something bad did happen to Gracie. Once she was admitted into the hospital, I couldn't move from that uncomfortable chair by her bedside. I stayed there day and night, holding her hand and whispering to her. I'd get in bed with her and cuddle with her. I stroked her hair. I told her how much I loved her. I told her she'd be okay. She wasn't okay.

The day they told me she was brain dead, I went crazy. I kept telling the doctors she wasn't gone, she was right there.

"_I'm so sorry, Mrs. Bolton... Grace is gone," the doctor said._

_I only half heard her. I was too busy talking to Gracie. _

"_Sharpay," Troy said harshly._

_I looked up at him. Tears were falling down his face. His eyes were red. I looked at the doctor. She had tears in her own eyes. "What? What's going on?" I asked._

"_Grace..." the doctor said._

"_What about her? She's sleeping."_

"_She's gone, Mrs. Bolton... I'm so sorry that we couldn't do anything more."_

_I stared at her. "She's... She's right here. She's not gone, she's right here."_

"_Mrs. Bolton, her brain... it's not functioning. She's brain dead. She's gone."_

_It set in, but I refused to believe it. "...No," I said. "No, she's... she's right here, she's in my arms. She's not gone, she's here," my voice cracked._

"_Shar..." Troy whispered. "She's gone, baby... She's not coming back."_

_I stared at Gracie. The doctor did something to a machine that I didn't care about. Then I realized it was her breathing machine. The doctor took the tube out of her mouth and I held my own breath as my precious Gracie took her very last. _

The second it hit me that she was really gone and I heard that flat line, I broke down. Tears poured, my chest heaved, and I felt sick to my stomach. My baby girl was really gone. Dead. Never coming home. I'll never hear her laugh or the pitter patter of her tiny three-year-old feet running down the hall. I'll never hear those sweet 'I wub you's.

That's all that went through my mind. That still goes through my mind. I'm a lot better now than I was back then. I don't dwell on the past anymore. I don't wish my life away. I don't take anything for granted. Instead of grieving over the loss of Gracie, I cherish the short time I had with her.

"Mom!"

Oh. Great. Someone broke something, or someone hit someone else... or someone... did something. God, I never get a break.

"Mom!"

"What!" I shouted, walking out of my office. "What is it? Who did what?"

"No one did anything," Bryce said. "Gracie needs a diaper change, and I'm not touching that. That's not my territory."

"You offered to babysit, Bryce Christopher. Diaper changing is part of babysitting. Go do it."

"Ew, no, please Mom, anything but that. It's different when she's just wet, but she reeks," he said, handing the baby over to me.

"Oh my gosh, I'll do it," Matt said, walking by us and taking Gracie from me. "Man up a little, Bryce. I'm the gay one, remember? Not you. Don't be such a girl."

I raised an eyebrow and smirked as we both watched Matt walk down the hall. At only 12 years old, Matt was very sure with his sexuality. "I guess he told you, then," I said, walking back into my study.

Bryce followed me and closed the door. "Mom."

"Bryce."

"I have a question."

"Which is...?" I asked, sitting at my computer desk.

"Can I go on a date with Christy?"

"Christy..."

"Christy Gray. She's the tall, blonde, and perky one."

I hated that girl with a passion. She was stuck up, obnoxious, and rude. Kind of like I was in high school. But worse. A lot worse.

Letting out a breath, I knew I couldn't keep babying him. He was fourteen years old. He had to have is first date at some point. "...As long as you're home by ten and no later than, then you can go. But you have to text me when you get there and when you're on your way home. That's it."

"No thirty minute check ups?"

"Not this time."

"I love you," Bryce said, hugging me. He looked at the ceiling. "Thank you, Gracie The First."

As he left the room, I leaned back in my chair, looking at the ceiling myself. "Yes... Thank you, Gracie The First."

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**So, let me know what you think. It'd mean a lot. I don't know Ava personally, but her story has been close to my heart since I learned about her tragic death. If you'd like more information on little Ava, you can go to www-sheyerosemeyerphotography-com/blog/superprince ss/ and read the whole story. Just replace the - with a period and take out the space between the 'e' and the 'ss' in superprincess.**


	2. Chapter 2

**The chapters will vary in length. I've never written a story in a POV before, so I don't really know how to lengthen it, but I promise I'll try to keep the chapters long. This chapter is a bit short, but I'm working on chapter 3 right now, so I'll try my best to make it longer. Thanks for reading! Please review if you have time. I love critique of all kinds.**

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**Chapter 2**

_I remember Gracie's third birthday party. We always did a tea party type of thing for her. For some reason, she just loved the little cups and saucers. And pink. She loved pink. Everything was pink. Decorations, the table cloth, the flowers, the center pieces, the cups. Even Gracie's little outfit. All pink. I hated pink by that time because she was obsessed with it. Pink used to be my favorite color. When Gracie's personality started developing more and more, she only chose anything that was pink. Never purple or any other pretty colors. Just pink._

_I remember setting up for her party. She was extremely questionable that day. She was driving me crazy, but I'd give everything to have that day back._

"Mommy!" Gracie said, running up to me.

"Yes, Gracie."

"I want dis, but I want it pink, otay?" Gracie asked, shoving a picture in my face.

I took it and looked at it for a few seconds. It was a purple battery powered Barbie car. Of course she would want it pink. "It has pink on it, honey, see? The words are pink."

"No, I want it pink. All of it. _Pink_, Mommy. Otay?"

I smiled and kissed her head. "Anything for you, Princess. I'll see what I can do."

"I'm not a pwincess!" Gracie said, stamping her foot. "I'm a _super_ pwincess."

"I'm sorry, _Super_ Princess. I'll try to find a pink car for you."

"Tank you. You's da best."

"I try."

"Gracie, I got you your balloon now come play with it or I'm gonna put it up," Bryce said, walking over to us.

"No! No put it up, I pway wif it, see, I want it. Pwease?" Gracie asked, holding her hands out towards the balloon.

"Don't lose it, okay? Don't take it off your wrist," he said, tying the balloon string to her tiny wrist.

"Why?"

"Because it'll fly away to the clouds and you won't see it again. You don't want to lose it, do you? It'll make your balloon sad if you lose it."

"I no make it sad, I pway wif it and I be nice. Tank you, Bwyce, I wub you," Gracie said, hugging her big brother.

Bryce hugged her back and kissed her cheek. "I love you too, Diva."

Gracie ran to the house, and I ran my hand through Bryce's hair, kissing his forehead. "Thank you, bud."

"Welcome."

"Anyone ever tell you you're the best big brother ever?"

"Yeah, but it's still nice to hear."

"She's a lucky little girl. Not many girls have big brothers that love them as much as you and Matt love her. Not a lot of brothers would go out of their way to help their sisters."

Bryce shrugged. "It's no big deal, Mom, it's my job."

"Mom? What happened to Mommy? I was Mommy this morning."

"I'm too old to call you Mommy."

I kissed his head again. "You're never too old. You call me Mommy for as long as you want. You know what you can do for me?"

"What?"

"Go keep Gracie out of the garage, that's where her Barbie car is and I don't want her to see it."

"Okay."

"Love you."

"Love you, too.'

* * *

I sat down on our bed, covering up. _God, why is it so cold?_ I covered up and cuddled into Troy. He always keeps me warm. He's like a warm teddy bear.

"Day went good?" Troy asked.

"Yeah. As good as a birthday party can go, anyways. Thank you for painting that car for Gracie. She would have gone nuts if it wasn't pink," I said.

"I'd do anything for you guys. You know that."

"I know. You're the best dad any little girl can have. I'm sure Gracie and Lily would agree."

"Lily can't agree on anything, she can't talk yet."

I laughed and laid my head on his chest. "I'm sure if she could talk she would agree that you're the best daddy in the whole wide world. I know I'd agree if you were my daddy."

"I'm your baby daddy."

"Don't ever say that again."

"You say it."

"Just don't. Ever."

"Yeah, it does sound a little gay coming from me, huh?"

"Yeah. A _little_. We'll go with that."


	3. Chapter 3

**Katherine Claire O'Connor: Sorry about the confusion! The chapters are a little out of order-because there are a couple of 'flashback' chapters, where Sharpay is remembering a time before Gracie's accident, so their ages will vary. At the time of the accident, Bryce is 7, Matt is 6, Gracie is 3, and Lily is still just an infant, so she doesn't have a specific age. In some 'flashback' chapters, Lily probably won't even be in it, but if she is, she's very little and won't have any parts until I get to the later chapters. In real life time, like in the first chapter, Bryce is 14, Matt is 13, Gracie would be 10, Lily is around 6 or 7, and the Gracie Bryce was talking about is actually the newest baby of the family after the accident and she's an infant in the first chapter. I hope that clears things up. If not, you'll probably get it better once the story is finished!**

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**Chapter 3**

"Mommy, I go to Papa's house," Gracie said.

"What for?" I asked, laying Lily in her bassinet.

"I go get my bwanket."

"Okay. Be careful and come back when you're done."

"Otay, bye."

No sooner than those words left her mouth, she was out the door. I couldn't help but smile a little. At least one kid would be out of the way for a while.

"Shar, Can you run to the post office later?" Troy asked as he walked into the kitchen. "I forgot to pick up my package."

"Sure. I'll do it after I get the last load of laundry in."

"Thanks. Where's Gracie?"

"Jack's. She forgot her blankie."

"Okay. I'm gonna do some yard work. I'll keep an eye out for her."

"Alright. Bryce, Matt! Come do your homework and do it now, you have to turn it in tomorrow!" I called upstairs.

"Mine's done," Bryce said. "But I'll help Matt with his," he said, walking into the kitchen.

"Alright. Thank you. Matthew Chad! Now!"

"I'm coming, jeez," Matt said, walking into the room.

"Don't 'jeez' me, just do your homework. Bryce is gonna help you. If he can't help, then ask me, but do not skip anything this time. You got an F on your last paper and that is unacceptable in this house."

"That means if you get another F, you have to move out and live with Grandma and Grandpa Evans," Bryce said.

Matt's eyes widened. "Mommy, I don't wanna live with them."

The look on his face was priceless. I hid a grin and shrugged. "Well then I guess you better not get another F, huh? Get to work. Do one page and you can have a snack and then you're finishing the rest. If you don't have it all done by bedtime, we're getting up early in the morning."

"I don't wanna get up early."

"Then you'll get it done tonight."

"Okay..."

"Keep an eye on Lily, Bryce. I'm gonna take a shower and I'll be back down, okay? Her bottle is in the fridge."

"Okay," Bryce said.

While I was in the shower, I completely lost myself. I thought about everything good in life. My kids, my job - I'm a daycare manager, my husband, my life and how it's gotten better since we had Bryce. When I finally came back to reality, I hopped out and got dressed before going back downstairs. I looked at the clock and looked around for a few seconds.

"Has Gracie come back inside?" I asked.

"I don't think so," Bryce said.

"Stay with them, I'll go look for her."

I walked outside and waved to Troy to get his attention so I wouldn't have to yell over the lawn mower. When he saw me, he turned it off.

"What?" Troy asked.

"Where's Gracie? She come back yet?" I asked.

"Not that I know of. She's probably still at Dad's."

I walked across our lawn and across Jack's before walking into my father-in-law's house. "Dad? Is Gracie still here?"

Jack walked out of the living room. "No. She went back home."

"No she didn't."

"She told me she was going home."

"She didn't... Gracie!" I shouted, going back outside.

"She's not over there?" Troy asked as I walked back to our lawn.

"No. Dad says she came back here."

"I never noticed her. She might be in the house."

I ran back into the house and looked everywhere. Her room, Bryce's room, Matt's room, Lily's room, our room. The basement, the bathroom, the attic, the backyard. Everywhere. She just wasn't there. When I went back downstairs, I put Lily in her playpen and told Matt to stay with her, while Bryce went outside with me. I was already in tears.

"Troy, she's not anywhere around here," I said with a small sob. "Where is she?"

"I don't know babe, but we'll find her."

"Grace Charlotte Bolton! If you're hiding, come out right now! Mommy is not in the mood for games!"

"I'll check the garage, maybe she was trying to get her car out," Troy said, walking into the house. He came back out less than a minute later and shook his head. "Not in there."

"Mommy," Bryce said.

"What do we do? Do we call the police? Do we issue an Amber Alert, what?" I asked as Troy hugged me.

"We'll find her, babe, it'll be fine."

"Mommy," Bryce repeated.

"What, Bryce?" I asked.

"The van's window is cracked. We don't leave the windows open."

I looked over to the van. The window of the driver's side was cracked. That meant someone had been inside of it. I moved out of Troy's embrace and ran to the van.

There she was.

In the driver's seat.

Asleep.

Barely breathing.

Letting out a rack of sobs, I tried to open the door, but she must have locked it. I forgot all about the keys in my pocket, so I took off my heels and hit the heel of my shoe against the glass as hard as I could, before pulling my sweet little Gracie out of the seat, hugging her close to me.

She was boiling hot. Almost too hot to touch. Her hair was soaked with sweat. I tried going in the house, but I kind of lost my balance so I just knelt to the ground, holding my precious baby girl close to me, rocking her back and forth and begging her to wake up.

"Gracie, please wake up, it's Mommy, wake up," I sobbed.

"Calm down, Shar, she'll be okay. Bryce, call 9-1-1. Now," Troy said, tossing his phone to Bryce.

Bryce fumbled with the phone before it finally went to his ear and he put it on speaker to hear better.

_"9-1-1, what's your emergency?" the dispatcher asked._

"My little sister was stuck in our car and she's asleep," Bryce said quickly.

_"Okay, what's your address?"_

"1754 Mockingbird Drive, Albuquerque, New Mexico."

_"Okay honey, we've got an ambulance coming right now. Stay on the line with me until they get there, okay?"_

"Okay."

_"Is your sister breathing?"_

"Mommy, is she breathing?"

"Barely," Troy said.

"My daddy says she's barely breathing."

_"Okay, tell your daddy to lay her down on a flat surface for me, okay?" the dispatcher said._

"She says lay Gracie down on a flat surface."

_"Once she's laid down, tell your daddy to get something to fan her with. Get a fan or a book to fan her with to try and cool her down."_

"She says get a fan and fan her off so she'll cool down."

"What about water?" Troy asked.

"Can we use water?"

_"No water sweetie, just a fan," the dispatcher said._

"No water, just a fan."

_"You're doing really good sweetheart. Listen for sirens, do you hear any sirens yet?"_

Bryce stayed quiet for a few seconds to listen. "It's really quiet but I hear it."

_"Okay, let me know when they're in front of your house and I'll let you know when you can hang up."_

"Okay."

_"What's your name?"_

"Bryce."

_"That's a very nice name, Bryce. My name is Grace."_

"That's my sister's name."

_"That's pretty cool, huh? What's your favorite color?"_

"Blue. No, green. I like green."

_"Green is a nice color. What about movies? What's your favorite movie?"_

"The Secret of Nimh."

_"I've never seen that one, what's it about?"_

"I don't remember, but there's mice or squirrels in it. I haven't seen it in a long time but it's my favorite."

_"Sounds like a fun movie. What's your favorite song?"_

"Life Is A Highway."

_"I love that song. Is the ambulance there yet, Bryce?"_

Bryce looked to the street and nodded. "Yeah, they're coming right now, they just now stopped."

_"Okay, Bryce, stay on the line with me. Is someone fanning Grace off?"_

"Yeah, my daddy is."

_"Where's your mommy?"_

"She's by Gracie, she's crying a lot."

_"Okay. Are the people from the ambulance helping?"_

"They're getting out of their truck right now and getting a bed out of the back."

_"Okay. You're doing a really good job, Bryce. How old are you?"_

"Seven but I'll be eight on Christmas."

_"That's fun. I wish my birthday was on Christmas."_

"I don't, I don't get as many presents."

_Grace laughed. "Presents are fun to get, huh? What did you get on your last birthday?"_

"I got a remote control helicopter, it was like the hospital ones."

_"That sounds really cool. Did you like it?"_

"Yeah, but I accidentally ran it into a wall and it broke so Mommy said I could get another one this year."

_"That sounds like a good deal. Are you on the nice list?"_

"I think so."

"Who's on the phone, little guy?" A paramedic asked.

"It's 9-1-1," Bryce said.

"Alright. Grace, we're here, we're taking care of the little girl."

_"Alright," Grace said. "Bryce, you can hang up with me now. You did a really good job, I'm sure your mommy and daddy are very proud of you. I hope your sister is okay."_

"Okay," Bryce said.

_"Bye, Bryce."_

"Bye," he said, hanging up.

"Good job, little man," the paramedic said. "You did really good. You know what little boys get when they do a good job talking to the police and giving them information?"

"What?"

The paramedic took a badge out of his pocket. "They get this _really_ cool badge that tells everyone that they're a hero," he said, pinning it to Bryce's shirt.

"I'm a hero?"

"Sure you are. You called 9-1-1 and you told them your address, and you did everything right in a situation like this. Your little sister's going to thank you for this when she gets bigger and understands what you did for her."

"I saw the window was open on the van."

"That means you found her. You did a really good job, buddy. Go show your mommy your badge."

I saw Bryce turn from the paramedic and run towards me. I could hardly keep my eyes off of Gracie, but I tried my best to stay calm for Bryce at least.

"Mommy, look what I got!" Bryce said, pointing to his badge. "The ambulance guy said I got this cause I'm a hero and did a good job telling Grace what happened."

"You _did_ do a good job, honey," I said, hugging him. I didn't want to let go. If I couldn't hold Gracie, I wanted to at least hold one of my babies. "I'm _so proud_ of you, Brycey... If it weren't for you, we wouldn't have found Gracie," my voice cracked.

"Are you okay, Mommy?"

"I'll be okay, sweetheart. I'm just scared."

"Don't be scared. Gracie will be okay. She's just tired."

"I know, honey. She'll be fine. She'll come home in a few days."

_Even though I didn't know if that was true or not, I wasn't going to make him scared. The truth is, Bryce really is a hero. I can't thank him enough for all the love and support he gave us that day. He was only seven, but he did a terrific job. He's Gracie's hero. He's_ my_ hero._


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Sometimes, it's hard to believe she's gone because Lily is so much like her. She's got her personality. I learned this soon after Gracie's passing. Lily got older, started getting more active. Once she was walking and talking, I saw Gracie all over again. Lily looks nothing like her, but her personality is definitely her. We just had a conversation similar to one Gracie and I had shortly before the accident.

_"Mommy," Gracie said._

_"Yeah, Super Princess," I said._

_"Where Nana at?"_

_"Nana's in Heaven, honey."_

_"Heaven?"_

_"Yep."_

_"Where dat at?"_

_"It's up in the clouds somewhere."_

_"I see heaven?"_

_"Nope. Only angels can see heaven."_

_"Tan I see Nana?"_

_"You'll see Nana again someday, but it'll be a really long time before you do. She's around us all the time, though. She's in our hearts."_

_Gracie gasped. "Her's in my heart? In there?" she asked, pointing to her chest._

_I laughed and nodded. "Yeah, Sweet Pea, in there. You can talk to her in your prayers."_

_"I tan pway to Nana?"_

_"You can pray to Nana any time you want."_

_"Otay, I go pway to Nana now," Gracie said before jumping off of the couch and running out of the room._

I remember that day like it was yesterday... The other day, Lily and I had almost the same conversation about Gracie. Somehow, she remembers having a big sister. I don't know how, because she was just a baby when Gracie passed. We talk openly about Gracie all the time, so I don't know if maybe she's just remembering things we've told her, or if she really remembers somehow.

_"Mommy, can we see Gracie?" Lily asked, sitting in my lap._

_"We're going to her grave site tomorrow," I said._

_"No, I mean see her. Can we see her?"_

_"No, honey."_

_"Why not?"_

_"Because Gracie's in Heaven."_

_"Can she see us?"_

_"Yep."_

_"How come she can see us but we can't see her?"_

_"Because Gracie's our guardian angel. She has to be able to see us. She's watching over us and making sure we're protected."_

_"Is she our hero?"_

_"I guess she is in a way."_

_"How?"_

_"Well... because, if it hadn't been Gracie that became our angel, it could have been you, or Bryce, or Matt."_

_"What about Baby Gracie?"_

_"Baby Gracie wasn't around when Gracie was."_

_"If I pray to Gracie, will she answer me?"_

_"She might. You'll have to try and see."_

_"Can I do it right now?"_

_"You can do it anytime you want to, Sweet Pea."_

_"Okay. I'll tell you if she answers," Lily said, getting down from my lap and leaving the room._

She's a sweetie pie. I remember after we told Bryce and Matt that Gracie wouldn't be coming home, Bryce was so strong. He cried, but he stayed strong for his little brother and sister. And for me. I'm so thankful I have him. I don't think I could have explained it any better than Bryce had to Matt. It was just a few days after Gracie's accident.

_"Why did Gracie get in the car without Mommy or Daddy?" Matt asked._

_"Daddy was outside. She thought it was okay to get in if Daddy was outside," Bryce said._

_"How come she didn't hit the window?"_

_"She probably did."_

_"How come Daddy didn't help her?"_

_"He was mowing, he wouldn't be able to hear her. We don't know if she hit the windows or not. No one knew she was in the car."_

_"Will Gracie ever come back?"_

_Bryce shrugged. "She'll come back in our dreams and let us know she's okay."_

_"Does she live on a cloud?"_

_"Yep. A pink one."_

_"She liked pink."_

_"Yep."_

_"Brycey?"_

_"What?"_

_"How come it had to be Gracie? How come it wasn't me or you?"_

_"Cause God had plans for Gracie. He needed her to be his helper and only Gracie could have done the job. If he took us to do Gracie's job, then the job wouldn't get done right and we could get in trouble for not doing it right."_

_"Is Gracie doing it right?"_

_Bryce nodded. "Yep. Gracie's doing her job the way she's supposed to. She's looking out for us. She's making sure we're okay and she's visiting Mommy so she feels better. She visits all of us when we're asleep and gives us angel kisses."_

_"What do angel kisses do?"_

_"They fill our hearts up with love. You know when we get sad sometimes cause we miss Gracie?"_

_"Yeah."_

_"It's cause the angel kisses are making our hearts get bigger and our tears and when we get sad are the love we have for Gracie."_

_"But love is a good thing. How come it makes us sad?"_

_"Because she's not here anymore, but we still love her and the sad has to come out."_

_"Will the sad ever go away?"_

_Bryce nodded. "I think so. It'll take a long time, but it'll go away some day and then we'll all be happy, and Gracie will be happy too."_

He was such a little helper. I can't thank him enough for that. He's the most amazing son a mother could ever ask for. I don't know what I'd ever do without him. I broke down just a few weeks ago, which doesn't happen often, but still does occasionally. He calmed me down and comforted me.

_"Mom, you have to calm down," Bryce said._

_"I can't, I looked at her shadow box," I said, sobbing._

_"Then don't look at it anymore, you know it just upsets you."_

_"I have to know that she's still here with us..."_

_Bryce sat next to me on my bed. He wrapped his arms around me and let me cry into his shoulder. "Mom, she's always here with us. She's everywhere. She's everything pink. She's inside Lily. She's in our hearts. She's around us every time we're happy. She's here all the time, you don't have to look at her things to know she's here. She's everywhere."_

_"It's not the same without her... I miss her so much, Brycey..."_

_"I know, Mom... I miss her, too... But, she wouldn't want you to be upset. She'd want you to be smiling and laughing, not crying. She doesn't like it when you're upset."_

_"I can't help it..."_

_"I know... You have me, Matt, and Lily and Baby Gracie. We're all here for you, you know that. I love you..."_

_"I love you too, baby..."_

He really is remarkable. The most... amazing young man a mother could ever ask for. Sometimes I think he's too good to be true. Then, he does something that just makes my heart melt.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

"We have to tell the boys," Troy said quietly as we walked into our house. "They have to know."

"Do we have to do it right now?" I asked.

"Better now than never. They'll wonder why she's not home."

"I don't know if I can do that to them..."

"I'll tell them, but you should be there. They'll want you."

I sighed, nodding. We made our way to the living room, where we heard the boys playing. Gabriella was sitting on the couch, staring into space. We'd let her know over the phone that the doctor took Gracie off of the life support and other machines.

Gabriella looked over at us as we walked in and I sat next to her. Her arm wrapped around me, pulling me into a side hug and she rested her head against mine. "I'm so sorry, Shar..." she whispered. "I'm so sorry..." her voice cracked.

"I don't know what to do," I whispered back.

"You'll know later. It'll come to you."

"Mommy? Where's Gracie?" Matt asked.

I stared at him for a few seconds before looking at Troy. Troy cleared his throat and sat on the couch with me and Gabriella, motioning for Matt to come to him. Bryce sat in my lap.

"Gracie..." Troy started.

"Where is she? Does she have to stay at the hospital for a few days?" Bryce asked.

"No, honey," I said.

"Boys... Gracie's not going to be able to come home," Troy said.

"Why not?" Matt asked.

"Because... Gracie passed away."

"What does that mean?"

"She died, Slugger..."

Bryce turned around on my lap, burying his face into my neck. I felt his body shaking, as he tried not to cry, but he was old enough to understand. I ran my hand over his back, kissing his head.

"Why?" Matt asked. "How come she died?"

"Because she was in the car for too long. The car was too hot for her to be in it and her body couldn't handle the heat," Troy said before swallowing.

I watched Matt. His eyes pooled with tears. His bottom lip retracted behind his tiny little teeth, trying not to cry. A few seconds later, he whined and started wailing, like he missed his mommy and wanted to go home from a sleep over.

Bryce finally let out a sob and I squeezed my eyes shut, my own tears falling down my cheeks. I rocked him back and forth slowly, running my hand over his back and I heard Gabriella sniffling repeatedly, trying not to break down.

"She's still with us in our hearts," I said with a strained voice. "She's not here in person, but her spirit is with us."

"Why did she get in the car when she wasn't supposed to?" Matt asked, coughing.

"She got distracted by her candy, honey. She forgot she wasn't allowed in the car."

"She's _stupid_!"

"Matthew Chad Bolton," Gabriella scolded.

"Go lay down in your room, buddy, I'll be up there in a minute," Troy said.

Sobbing, Matt ran out of the room and Troy leaned over, kissing mine and Bryce's heads. "I'll be back down when I get him calmed down," he whispered.

I nodded and turned my face into Bryce's neck as he did the same to me. I hugged him tighter, never wanting to let my baby boy go.

"I don't want Gracie to be dead," Bryce finally said through coughs.

"I know, honey, none of us do," I said, wiping his tears away with my thumbs.

"How come God took Gracie? How come he didn't take_ me_? I'm older."

I let out a rack of sobs and Gabriella sniffled, pulling Bryce into her own lap, letting him lay his head on her chest.

"Sometimes God works in ways we don't understand, Brycey," Gabriella said. "God always has a reason to take someone, even if we don't understand or like that reason. God needed Gracie to help him with something and he couldn't wait until she was older."

"But, I could have helped him, he didn't have to take Gracie. I would have done it. I would have done a good job, too, the ambulance guy gave me a badge because I did a really good job talking to the police."

"I know sweetheart, but this job was meant just for Gracie. If a job isn't meant for someone and they take it, they won't do a good job. Gracie's going to do a really good job at what she's going to do."

"What's she gonna do?" Bryce asked, coughing and wiping his nose with the back of his hand.

"She's going to watch over everyone and make sure they're okay."

"But we're not okay because she's not here with us."

I held my head in my hands, silently sobbing. I felt Gabriella's hand running across my back.

"She's in our hearts," Gabriella said, tapping Bryce's chest. "Right in there. She always will be. I promise."

"She'll never leave?"

"She'll never leave our hearts. Ever."

"Never ever?"

"Never ever."

_I was thankful for Gabriella. Especially that day. When we graduated high school, we became really good friends. She's our kids' godmother. I wouldn't trust another living soul with my children but Gabriella. Her being there for us to tell the boys about Gracie helped a lot. I wouldn't have been able to explain it to Bryce as well as she had. I'm thankful for her every single day. I always will be._


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

It's been a few days since Gracie's passing. We're all still torn, but we're almost back to our regular schedule. I still cry out of nowhere, but not nearly as hard as I did that first day. Now we're just trying to keep the boys occupied and getting their homework caught up. We let their teachers know that Gracie passed away and they said they'd give them a couple of easy weeks and then work back up to where they were at before. I couldn't be more thankful.

"Mommy, what's a kink?" Matt asked.

I almost spit my water out, looking over at him. "_Excuse_ me?"

"What's a kink?"

"In what sense...?"

"Huh?"

"Why are you asking what a kink is?"

"Cause Daddy said the water hose had a kink in it."

"Oh..."

_Thank God that's what he meant._

"It just means that the water hose was folded a certain way and water couldn't come out," I said.

"Oh. Okay."

"What did you think he meant?" Bryce asked.

I looked at Bryce for a few seconds. "...Nothing. It's nothing, just forget it. Are you done with your activity sheet your teacher gave you?"

"Yep."

"Did you color it like you were supposed to?"

"She said I could color it whatever color I wanted."

"Did you?"

"I made the whole thing pink. For Gracie," Bryce said, holding his coloring page up.

I smiled a little. "Gracie would love that, Mug."

"How come you call me that?"

"Mug?"

"Yeah."

"Because when you were a baby, you gave people a grumpy look, and a lot of people call it a mean mug, so I started calling you Mug."

"Oh. How come Daddy calls Matt Slugger?"

"I dunno, honey. You'll have to ask him later. Do you want lunch?"

"Yeah! What are you making?"

"Macaroni and cheese and chicken nuggets."

"Can I have some of both?"

"Only if you drink a PediaSure."

"Okay."

"_And_ take a vitamin."

"Yuck."

"Take it or leave it."

"Okay..."

"Matt, do you want some of both?"

Matt shook his head. "No. I want nuggets. No macaroni, just my nuggets cause macaroni makes my tummy hurt," he said.

"It's not the macaroni that does that honey, it's the _cheese_. I'll make extra nuggets just for you. Finish your coloring page, too."

"Can I color mine pink for Gracie, too?"

I nodded. "Sure, sweetie. I'll start lunch after I feed Lily, okay? I need to feed her first," I said.

"How come?"

"Because Mommy starts to hurt if I don't feed her every so often," I said, walking to Lily's bassinet and picking her up.

"Why?"

"Because Lily eats from Mommy still," Bryce said. "She only takes bottles when Mommy's not here to feed her."

"How come?"

"Because it's better for babies that way," I said. "You finish coloring."

"Okay."

I sat down in one of the kitchen chairs, laying Lily in my arms. As I got her positioned to my breast and she started eating, I stared at her. I gazed into those gorgeous blue eyes that she got from her father. As she looked up at me, I smiled. I remember nursing Gracie. She'd curl up to me, one arm under mine and on hand balled up in a fist against my breast. Just like Lily was doing.

"Shar, I'm home," Troy called out.

"Daddy!" Matt and Bryce shouted, startling Lily.

Lily started crying, detaching from my breast, and I patted her diaper lightly trying to calm her down.

"Sh, sh. It's okay, Lily. They didn't mean to scare you, it's okay."

Bryce looked at Lily for a few seconds and he got down from his chair, walking over to me. He slowly ran his finger down the length of Lily's nose, and she slowly calmed down with every time he did it. I looked at him for a few seconds and smiled.

"How'd you know to do that, Mug?" I asked.

Bryce shrugged. "It worked for Gracie, so I thought it would work for Lily, too."

I cupped his chin and kissed his cheek. "Good job, buddy. You're a good big brother."

"I know," he said, sitting in his chair again.

"What's all the racket?" Troy asked, walking into the kitchen. He kissed the boys' heads and we shared a small kiss ourselves before I got Lily to start sucking on my breast again.

"The boys scared Lily. She's okay now. Bryce saved the day."

"Our little hero, he is."

I smiled. "That's _right_, you're a hero."

"No I'm not," Bryce said.

"Sure you are, you got that really cool badge from the paramedic and everything."

"But Gracie wasn't okay. She died."

I bit my lip lightly. I looked at Lily for a few seconds before looking at him again. "You still helped, though, honey. A lot. When you're older, you'll understand just how big a help you were that day."

"Do I still help a lot?"

"You do. You help with Matt a lot and you help with Lily. You're a really good big brother. You're the best in the west."

"Like a sheriff?"

"Just like a sheriff."


	7. Chapter 7

**Kathryn Claire O'Connor: If the story weren't in anyone's POV, Bryce would definitely have weak spots. But, since it's in Sharpay's POV, and she considers him perfect, that's how I make him seem. Does that make sense? I've actually met kids like Bryce - it's rare, but it happens. But that's why he seems to do nothing wrong. If it was in a normal story form, he'd definitely have some rough patches.**

* * *

**Chapter 7**

"Lillian Faith, don't you dare," I said to Lily as she reached for a glass on the kitchen table.

"No," Lily said.

"That's right, no no. You don't touch breakable cups, honey," I said as I picked up my thirteen-month-old.

Thirteen months... God, time's really gone by. It's been ten months since the accident. I don't find myself thinking about it as much, and when I do, I don't get as upset. Not nearly as much as I did before.

"Mommy, look what I found!" Matt said, running into the kitchen.

"What is it, baby?"

"It's a picture. Daddy says it's Gracie, but it doesn't look like her," he said as he handed the picture to me.

I looked at it and smiled. "That's because that was when she was in my tummy. This is an ultrasound. This is the first picture that was taken of her."

"That's a weird picture. I never looked like that..._ did_ I?"

I laughed a little and kissed his head, putting the picture on the table. "You_ all_ looked like that, hon. Bryce Christopher!" I called out. "Get your backpack and take it to your room, please!"

"Mommy, can I go to Papa's?"

"Yes. Call me as soon as you get there. Stay away from cars."

"Yeah, yeah, same story every day," Matt said before leaving the room.

"Bryce! Now, please!"

"Coming, Mom," Bryce said just before entering the room. "I was doing homework. Can I stay the night at Chris' house tonight?"

"Not tonight but maybe tomorrow. Daddy said he had some news for us when he gets home and he'll be here soon."

"But Matt's not here."

"We can tell Matt when he comes back. You're older, he can tell you when he tells me. I'm getting ready to start dinner, will you keep an eye on Lily?"

"Yeah. Come here, Lily. We'll play with your blocks," he said taking Lily from me and leaving the room.

Gosh, he's such a good brother. He's almost... perfect. He does have his bad days, I'll admit to that.

By the time Troy got home, Matt was back as well, and I'd just gotten dinner ready and served. Just as Troy walked into the kitchen, I placed Lily on my lap so she would actually eat instead of throw her food everywhere. She wouldn't really eat unless she was on my lap. She's a picky one.

"How was work?" I asked as Troy kissed the boys' heads.

"It was good. I have that good news I was telling you about," Troy said, kissing Lily's head and my lips.

"What is it?"

"Well..." he said, sitting down in his chair. "I got a job promotion."

I smiled. "Really? That's great. What's the job?"

"Coach of the Redhawks."

"No _way_, are you serious?"

"I'm serious."

"That's great, Troy, when do you start?"

"As soon as we get out to Oklahoma City."

I stared at him for a few seconds. "...What? We have to move?"

"If I want this job, then yeah. It'll be good to get away."

"I don't _want_ to get away though, Troy, this is our _home_."

"They've got a house set up already."

"What about _our_ house, Troy? What are we supposed to do if something doesn't go right out there?"

"Why wouldn't it? What do we have to lose? We can't lose much more than we already have. What do we have here that we won't in Oklahoma City?"

"Grace."

We stared at each other for a few seconds and I could feel the boys looking back and forth between us. It was a long, painful silence and I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes but I blinked them away and kept staring at Troy.

He finally looked away and sighed. "Look... I know we have close ties with her here, but we can always come back and visit every few months. We can take all of her stuff with us, it'll be fine."

"But we can't move her _grave_, Troy. It hasn't been that long..."

"It's been almost a year, babe... I know it's going to be hard, but this is something I've been hoping for since I was in high school."

"What about _me_?"

"You don't have anything that you do, you stay at home all day coloring with Lily."

"I run a _day care_ in this house, thank you very much," I said, getting up from my chair with Lily.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry. I forgot. I'm never around all the other kids, I forget you work."

"Thanks, Troy," I said, walking out of the room.

Troy sighed, sitting back in his chair. Bryce and Matt looked at him for a few seconds.

"Is Mommy mad?" Matt asked.

"Yeah," Troy said.

"How come?"

"Because I don't always acknowledge that she works hard."

"But she just cooks and cleans. That's not hard."

"It's pretty hard work, Slugger. When you're older and have your own house, you'll understand."

"Will Mommy forgive you?"

"I hope so."

* * *

"Ow! Okay, Gabriella... I can't breathe," I said, patting Gabriella's back to get out of her embrace.

"Right," she said, stepping back. "I'm sorry. I'm just... I'll miss you guys so much."

"We'll miss you, too. Bryce, Matt, come say bye to Aunt Gabby."

Matt ran over to us and held his arms out to her. "I wanna hug," he said.

Gabriella picked him up, kissing his cheek as she wrapped her arms around him. "I'm gonna miss you guys more than anything," she said, hugging Bryce as he hugged her waist.

"I'll miss you, too," Matt said.

"You make sure you come visit me, okay?"

"Can't you come with us?" Bryce asked. "You like having us around don't you?"

"I love having you guys around, sweetheart."

"How come you don't come with us, then?"

"Because I have things I have to keep in check down here. I'll visit you when I can, okay? I promise."

"Okay."

Gabriella put Matt down and took Lily from me, kissing her cheek. "I'm gonna miss you too, Chubbo. You have to call me every night and give me our butterfly kisses, okay?"

"Tisses," Lily said.

Gabriella laughed and she gave Lily another kiss. "I love you. You behave for Mommy, okay? You two behave, too. If I hear you're not behaving you won't want me to come and see you."

"I'll be good," Matt said. "I'm always good."

Gabriella snorted, ruffling his hair. "Yeah right,_ you're_ the trouble maker," she said, handing Lily back to me and giving me another hug. "I'll miss you, Shar... Call me every day and let me know how my babies are doing. I'll let Gracie know you'll be back, and yes I'll tell her you guys love her."

I smiled. "Thanks..."

"Anytime."

"Everyone ready?" Troy asked. "Kids in their carseats. Now."

"You heard Daddy, get in your seats," I said.

"Do I have to sit in a booster seat?" Bryce asked getting into the van.

"Yes you do. You're still underweight."

"I don't like booster seats."

"I do," Matt said, climbing into his seat and buckling himself up.

"Get in and buckle up, Brycey," I said putting Lily into her car seat.

"Okay," Bryce said. "Can we stop for ice cream?"

"No," Troy and I said together.

"McDonald's?"

"No," we said again.

"Wait," I said. "We'll have to stop to let them eat, so yes to McDonald's. No to ice cream."

"I don't need to eat," Troy said.

"They're eight, seven, and one. They have to eat."

"Alright, alright... You win. _This_ time."

"Mommy always wins," Matt said.

"No she doesn't."

"Yes she does," Bryce, Matt, and I said.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

"Do we need the pink cups or the white ones?" Troy asked.

"Both," I said. "We'll mix and match. Saucers should be pink, though. I don't think we have any white ones."

"Alright. I'll get those set up. Are the table cloths on the tables already?"

"Yeah, Bryce and Matt did it for me. Taylor and Chad just pulled up, you wanna get Chad to help with the streamers while I help Taylor get the kids out of the car?"

"Yeah. Just send him over."

I nodded as I walked over to Chad and Taylor's car. They'd moved to Oklahoma City about a year before we did. Chad's been playing for the Redhawks since they moved, so when we got out here, it was nice to have a few familiar people to socialize with.

"Aunt Sharpay!"

I smiled, opening up the backseat as Taylor got out of the car. "Hi, Sissy. Have you been a good girl?" I asked, helping the four-year-old out of her car seat.

"Yeah. Bailey's been bad, though."

"Have you been bad, Bailey?"

"No," the two-year-old said. "I a good girl."

"Yeah, right," Taylor said. "You've both been annoying each other."

"Chad, Troy's putting the streamers up around the yard, will you help him?" I asked.

"Sure thing," Chad said.

I got Bailey out of her car seat and kissed her cheek. "I missed you."

"Me, too," Bailey said.

"You wanna go play with Lily? She's over there in the sandbox."

"Sand! I pway in the sand, I go pway."

I laughed and put her down, watching her run over to the sandbox and I closed the back door of the car before sharing a hug with Taylor.

"How've you been?" Taylor asked.

"Pretty good, actually."

"Is Gabriella coming?"

"No. She tried to get off work to make it, but they wouldn't let her. She's planning on visiting once school's out, though. Only a few more months."

"Good. We need to get the whole gang together some day."

"We do, it'll be fun."

"Where's Matty and Brycey?" Sissy asked.

"They're helping put stuff on the table. You can go help them but you have to listen to Bryce, okay? He's doing it a special way that he wants it."

"Okay," she said before running off.

Her name isn't really Sissy, it's just what everyone calls her. Her name is Cecilia. We don't call her that unless she's in trouble.

After a while, the party got started. Oh, I might want to mention what it's even for. Since It's Gracie's birthday, we're throwing her a tea party. We decided to do it every year, so we're still celebrating her life. I dread the next few days as it gets closer to the anniversary of her accident. I've been okay so far, but I just don't know how I'll be on the day of.

I invited all the families of the kids from my day care. Since I still have my license, I started the day care up again so I would still be working. I've gotten pretty close with some of the parents. One parent, Alyssa, also lost a child to heat exhaustion. Her son got locked in their car, just like Gracie. I'm closest with her.

As I looked around the yard to monitor the kids, I saw a car pull up the long driveway. I didn't recognize it at all. It almost made me nervous.

"Troy?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said.

"Did you invite someone else?"

"No. Why?"

"Someone pulled up and I don't know their car."

"Maybe it's a new car."

I watched as the car parked and I saw a small woman get out of the passenger seat. I caught a glimpse of her face, but she opened the back seat door so her face was blocked. It wasn't until someone got out of the driver's side that I knew who it was.

The second I saw his face, my eyes filled with tears and I let out a little sob, running over to him and hugging him. "Ryan..."

"Hey, Shar," Ryan said, kissing my head. "Don't cry."

"I missed you..."

"I missed you, too. How's everything going?"

"Perfect now that you're here," I said, burying my face into his neck.

"I beg to differ. You're the life of the party, you don't need me here to make it worth anything."

"I'm not complete without my other half."

"You're a strong woman. You're fine without me."

I shook my head and stayed there for a few seconds before a voice spoke up.

"Sorry to interrupt this reunion, but a little girl wants to meet her Auntie."

I pulled away from Ryan and smiled, seeing Kelsi. He didn't tell me she was pregnant. He didn't even tell me they were together. What kind of brother is he?

I smiled at the baby in Kelsi's arms and ran my finger over her cheek. "Well, aren't you just adorable?"

"Her name is Shaylin," Kelsi said, handing her over to me.

I stared at my niece for a few seconds. "She looks really familiar."

"She looks just like you," Ryan said.

"What? Nuh uh."

"Yeah, Blonde hair, brown eyes. She's got your nose and everything."

I looked at Shaylin for a few more seconds before realizing Ryan was right. She does look just like me. "Wow... That's insane..."

"Where's my niece and nephews?"

"Over there at Gracie's table."

"I'm gonna go surprise them. You two catch up," Ryan said before making his way to the yard.

"How've you been?" Kelsi asked.

"The same, I guess. Pretty good. Kids are adjusting, I'm adjusting," I said.

"I'm sorry I didn't go to her funeral. I had the worst morning sickness. I couldn't get out of bed almost."

"It's fine, no big deal."

"It's a pretty big deal. I'm sorry that happened to you guys."

"We are, too. We're a lot more careful now. Cars go in the garage and stay locked now. I just regret not being more careful before it happened."

"It wasn't your fault, Sharpay. She was just a curious little girl. It's unfortunate."

I nodded, looking at Shaylin again. "I can't get over how pretty you are. How old is she?"

"Five months."

"Ryan didn't even tell me you guys were together, let alone having a baby. He didn't mention you being pregnant at the funeral."

"I told him not to. I didn't want anything to take focus away from Gracie."

"I don't think it would have mattered that day. I was tired of getting the condolences."

"I can't even imagine how terrible it must have been."

"It was horrible."

"If you ever need anything, just let us know. You know we'll do anything for you guys."

"I appreciate it, Kelsi. Really."

"What's a sawed off sondheim good for if she can't be there for her sister-in-law?"

I smiled. "Pretty sawed off, I guess."


	9. Chapter 9

**I'm SO sorry it took me so long to get this chapter posted. I've been busy. To be honest, this isn't my best or longest chapter. It's probably my worst. But at least it's a little something, right?!**

* * *

**Chapter 9**

"Troy!" I shouted, walking into our house. "Troy, where are you!"

"I'm right here, what's wrong?" Troy asked running into the foyer.

"Nothing. Nothing is wrong."

"Then why are you freaking out?"

"It's a good thing."

"What is it, then?"

"I'm pregnant."

Troy stared at me. He looked back and forth between my eyes. "Wha-you're serious?"

I smiled as I let out a small sob, tears running down my cheeks. "I'm serious. I'm pregnant, we're having a baby," I said letting out a rack of sobs and I wrapped my arms around his neck.

"Babe, that's great!" Troy said, wrapping his arms around my waist. He kissed my head and ran his hand through my hair. "I can't believe it..."

"I'm almost four months."

"Four... How did we miss it?"

I shrugged and shook my head. "I don't know, but we've been trying for years so I don't even care."

It'd been since a few months after Gracie passed away. It's been years. 7 years, in fact. We aren't over Gracie's death, but we aren't letting our lives revolve around it. We speak about her in positive ways and hardly ever mention the accident. Now that we knew for sure that I was finally pregnant, the only other thing we had to do was tell the kids.

"Where are the kids?" I asked.

"Living room."

I made my way into the living room and ran my hand through Bryce and Matt's hair, only to get my hand swatted away twice. "I have some news for you guys," I said, walking around to the front of the couch.

"Yeah, we're busy, Mom," Bryce said.

"We have to finish this level or we have to start from the very beginning," Matt said.

"Okay, well I think you'll really like this news," I said.

"Right after we finish, Mom. Promise."

I watched the boys play their game for a few seconds. Finally, I stood in front of the TV, earning calls of disapproval from the boys. "I'm pregnant," I said.

They both stared at me, and at the same time they got up from the couch and hugged me, almost smothering me in the process.

"Mom, that's great!" Bryce said.

"Yeah, now we'll have all three of us back in the house," Matt said before biting his lip and slightly retreating away from me.

I knew what he meant. I knew he didn't mean it the way it came out.

I held my arm out toward him. "Come here, Matty."

Matt walked closer to me and I brought him into a hug, kissing his head. "It's fine, baby. I know what you meant. It'll be nice to have three of you running around here again."

"Do you know what it is yet?" Bryce asked.

I shook my head. "Not yet, but I should find out soon. I'll tell you what, you guys can come with me when I find out what it is."

"No thanks, I don't wanna see my mom's junk."

"Okay, moms don't have _junk_. They have _vaginas_, and mine will not be on display for you two to see. They'll do all that stuff first and then the doctor will call you in to see the ultrasound."

"Thank god. I came out of that thing, I don't wanna go back to it."

I laughed and thumped his head. "Play your stupid game. Matt, you wanna help me bake those cookies?"

"No, the question is, do _you_ wanna help _me_ bake the cookies, because let's face it, Mom; you're not a good cook," Matt said.

"Thanks for the vote of confidence, honey. It's always warm and welcome."

"Yeah. Okay."

* * *

As we laid in bed that night, we couldn't sleep. We tried, but we just couldn't. Nothing was working. We don't know if it was because we were excited about the baby, or if it was something else, but it was keeping us awake and it was eating at us.

I sighed, staring at the ceiling. I could hear Troy's even and steady breathing, but I knew he was awake. I looked over to him and turned over on my side. "Troy?"

"Hm?"

"This baby... It's a miracle."

I heard him nod. "It is."

"I didn't think I'd be able to get pregnant after Gracie..."

I had a lot of scar tissue after Gracie's birth. The doctors said it would be hard if not impossible to get pregnant again.

"I feel like this is Gracie's way of telling us she's okay..." I said.

"It could be, babe."

I cuddled into Troy. I loved his scent. He smelled like cinnamon and wood. I don't know how it blends so well, but it does. I almost get a high from it. I laid my head on his chest and breathed in his scent, closing my eyes.

"Will we take better care of this baby than we did Gracie?"

"We took care of Gracie," Troy said. "I don't ever want to hear you say we didn't take good enough care of her. She was just adventurous and she accidentally locked herself in the car. It was an accident, it wasn't anyone's fault."

"We should've been watching her..."

"I don't wanna talk about it, we've talked about this before. Go to sleep."

Sighing, I gave up. He always won that fight. I didn't blame him.


End file.
